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OOOOOOOHHHHHHH!
This page is the transcript for "Prank Callers".

(Episode begins with Mordecai and Rigby laughing when they are watching a prank call video on the computer. On the computer a phone rings)

Old Woman: Hello

Master Prank Caller: Oh, yes, this is i'm a sure.

Old Woman: I'm a sure who?

Master Prank Caller: I-m-a sure glad I ain't Joe Mama! (Mordecai & Rigby both laugh at the prank call video) Oh, yeah! You just got pranked by the Master Prank Caller!

Rigby: The Master Prank Caller is the funniest thing on the internet, right, Mordecai?

Mordecai: Ye-e-eyah, I guess he's pretty funny. But you know what is even funnier than watching prank phone calls?

(Mordecai looks at the telephone)

Mordecai & Rigby: Hmm, hmm, hmmm!

(Cuts to Pops's Room. Pops is ironing his pants when the telephone rings.)

Pops: Hello?

Rigby: Hello, Pops?

Pops: Yes?

(Mordecai and Rigby start snickering)

Rigby: Please hold for a collect call from... Joe Mama!

(Both Mordecai & Rigby laugh, and call Skips, who is seen lifting weights)

Skips: Hello?

Rigby: Hey, Skips, do you have a son named Joe Mama?

Skips: Excuse me?

(Mordecai and Rigby laugh again. Skips hangs up with an angry look.)

(Cuts to Benson's apartment. He is sitting in his easy chair when the phone rings)

Benson: Hello?

Mordecai: Hey, Benson, you got any books by Joe Mama?

Benson: Who is this? (Mordecai and Rigby laugh even harder than before. Mordecai lets go of the phone with Benson still talking)

Mordecai & Rigby: Jah ha ha ha ha ha ha, whoo ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Benson: Whoever this is coming from, I will track you down and I will find you...!

Mordecai: Oh, dude, he's still on the phone!

Rigby: He's still on the phone?!

Mordecai: He's still on the phaahahaha?!

(Mordecai and Rigby laugh their hardest and Mordecai hangs up. Rigby's eyes begin to water)

Rigby: O-O-O-h! Oh, Mordecai, we're the best prank callers ever, aren't we?

Mordecai: Yeah, second best.

Rigby: What!? Uh! Did you not hear what we just did? We were hilarious!

Mordecai: Yeah, we were. But we're not number one until we do this.

(Mordecai picks up a phone book and starts sifting through pages)

Rigby: Who you calling? (Mordecai stops shifting through pages and points to a number on the book)

Mordecai: The Master Prank Caller.

(Mordecai takes the phone)

Rigby: Holy crap!

(Mordecai is about to dial when suddenly the door bangs open)

Benson: Hang up that phone! You think your little pranks are funny, huh? You think they're funny? (Benson walks towards the phone and pretends to think he's being called by someone) Well, what do you guys think of my prank? Ring, ring. Hello, what's that? Mordecai and Rigby are banned from using the house phone? Okay. (Suddenly, Benson's face turns red)

Benson: RGGHHH!!!!! (Benson pulls the phone from the wall and smashes it to pieces on the floor) GRRGHG!!! GRAAGH!!! GAAH!!! GOOD LUCK MAKING YOUR PRANK CALLS NOW!!!!!!!!!! (Benson then throws the remains of the phone down and slams the door on his way out)

Mordecai: Dude, let's go use Pops' phone.

(Pops' room. Pops is still on the phone and the iron is still on his pants, which are smoking)

Rigby and Mordecai: Pops, can we borrow your phone?

Pops: Oh, I would, but I'm holding to talk with Joe Mama! (A pulse tone is heard from the phone) But you welcome to use the phones under my bed.

(Mordecai and Rigby walk towards Pops' bed.)

Mordecai: Aww, cool! What kind are they? (Rigby pulls a case from under Pops' bed and opens it to find 80s brick-sized phones.)

Rigby: Aw! 80's cellphones!

Mordecai & Rigby: Cool. Thanks, Pops.

Pops: Oh, and boys... do be careful. I think they might cause brain tumors. (Dramatic music plays as Pops turns back to the phone and then his head starts to throb. Mordecai and Rigby exchange knowing glances.)

(Cuts to the park. Mordecai and Rigby wrap foil around their heads)

Rigby: All right. Now let's prank the Master Prank Caller.

Mordecai: Okay, here I go. (Mordecai dials the phone and the telephone rings. The Master Prank Caller picks up to answer.)

Master Prank Caller: Hello?

Mordecai:: Yeah, this is, uh, pizza delivery guy? I have 50 pizzas here that you ordered. (Mordecai and Rigby snicker)

Master Prank Caller: Sounds great. Bring them over.

Mordecai:: Uh, you ordered 50 pizzas?

Master Prank Caller: Yeah, and hot wings. Get here quick, okay? Your mom's like totally starving.

Mordecai:: Yeah, uh, okay. I got to go. (Mordecai hangs up the phone)

Rigby:: Let me take a crack at it. (Rigby dials and the telephone rings again)

Master Prank Caller: Hello?

Rigby:: (Idiotic voice) Hi, this is Stan.

Master Prank Caller: Stan who?

Rigby:: Uh... Stan... (Normal voice) Stanminson.

Master Prank Caller: Your name is Stan Stanminson?

Rigby: Uh... yep.

Master Prank Caller: Well, congrats. That's the stupidest fake name I've ever heard. And what happened to your unfunny fake voice?

Rigby: I don't know.

Master Prank Caller: Now listen up, stop calling here or I'm going to make you sorry! (MPC hangs up phone)

Mordecai: Woah, this guy's good. I don't know, maybe we shouldn't do this.

Rigby: What, you givin' up? Dude, we can prank this guy. Do you want to be this guy's son, or do you want to be number one?

Mordecai:: Hmm, hmm, let's do it. (Mordecai dials the phone) Hello, Master Prank Caller, this is...

Master Prank Caller: Get it. (MPC hangs up)

Rigby:: Hmm. (Rigby dials the phone) Yeah buddy, its Joe Ma..

Master Prank Caller: Heard it. (MPC hangs up)

(Mordecai dials the phone)

Mordecai:: Yeah, hello...

Master Prank Caller: You got anything original? (MPC hangs up)

Rigby:: "Yeah hello?" Dude, that was the worst try yet! (Rigby dials the phone) Time to put an end to this junk fest. Hmm.

(MPC hangs up right away)

Mordecai:: Looks like the junk fest just got a new member.

Rigby:: Yeah right, like your 50 pizzas thing was way better!

Mordecai:: Whatever Stan Manastan, man. (Laughs)

(Phone suddenly rings)

Mordecai:: Pff, nice try, dude. I know it's you.

Rigby:: Uh.. not me, dude.

(Mordecai picks up and both listen)

Mordecai:: Hello?

(The Master Prank Caller's feet are seen. He is in the bathtub)

Master Prank Caller: Is this the pizza guy or Stan Stanminson?

Mordecai:: Uh... both.

Master Prank Caller: I warned you to leave me alone. Now I'm gonna prank you so hard, you're both gonna poop a duke. The 1980s called: they want their cell phones back!

(Mordecai and Rigby are sucked into the phones and are sent tumbling through cables in space, with year numbers floating around them)

Mordecai & Rigby: AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Rigby: Where are we?

Mordecai:: Dude, I think we're back at the park.

Rigby:: Are we?

Mordecai:: What do you mean?

Rigby:: Dude, all the trees are small, and look at that park bench, it's so new looking. I'm telling you, something weird's going on.

Mordecai:: Look there's Pops. Let's go ask him. (Pops is facing away from the duo, working on planting a tree) Pops! Hey Pops, can you tell Rigby here that everything is fine?

(Pops turns around, looking and sounding much younger than normal)

Pops:: What now?

(Mordecai and Rigby both gasp)

Mordecai:: Why does Pops look so young?

Pops:: Now then, who are you two gentlemen? How do you know my name?

Mordecai:: Pops! It's us, Mordecai and Rigby.

Pops:: But I've never met i either of you gentlemen in my entire life.

Mordecai:: What?

Rigby:: I'm telling you, dude, something weird's going on.

(M&R see a few B-Boys dancing)

Rigby:: Hey, guys!

B-Boy 1: What?

Rigby:: You notice anything strange going on around here?

B-Boy 1: Is he getting fresh with us?

B-Boy 2: Yo, I think he's up in our threads, homefry.

B-Boy 1: That dillweed just barfed me out.

(B-Boys walks away)

Rigby:: Fresh? Barf me out? Homefries? We're in the 80s, dude! Pops, what year is this?

Pops:: Well, it's 1982, of course.

Rigby:: See?

Mordecai:: Dude, this is bad.

Rigby:: I know. I don't even like the 80s that much!

Mordecai:: The only way were going to get back is that we prank him harder than he pranked us.

Rigby:: Let's do it.

(Mordecai dials the phone)

Master Prank Caller: Hello?

Mordecai:: The 60s called, they want their..

Master Prank Caller: What did I tell you about calling me?! (A yellow, sparkling cloud begins to shoot out of the top of the phone, shocking Mordecai and Rigby)

Rigby:: Hang up! Hang up!

Mordecai:: I can't! (Mordecai drops the phone)

(A giant 80s cell phone morphs out of the cloud. It's the Master Prank Caller)

Master Prank Caller: You couldn't leave me alone. Now you're gonna pay! (MPC dials on himself)

Mordecai:: We should get out of here.

Rigby:: The cart!

(Mordecai and Rigby drive away in the golf cart. The Master Prank Caller follows them, dialling again. In the cart, the phone rings and Rigby picks up)

Rigby:: Hello?

Master Prank Caller: The 80s called. They still want ya!

(80s clothes appear on Mordecai and Rigby. They scream, the Master Prank Caller laughs, and Rigby hangs up)

Mordecai:: Aw, man, these aren't even the cool clothes from the 80s!

(Phone rings again and Rigby picks up)

Rigby:: Listen, just leave us alone, will you?!

Master Prank Caller: Don't you ever hang up on me!

(More clothes from the 80s appear on Mordecai and Rigby. Mordecai waves his arm and screams at a golden bracelt on his arm that reads 'Dawn')

Mordecai:: Dude, you have to call somebody to help us prank this guy!

Rigby:: Who?!

Mordecai:: Just call somebody!

(The scene cuts back to the present time at the park. The other 80s cell phone rings. Pops picks it up)

Pops:: Ooh, telephone! Hello?

Rigby:: Pops, you got to help us, we're stuck in the 80s!

Benson:: Who are you talking to?

Pops:: Why it's Mordecai and Rigby. They're stuck in the 1980s.

Benson:: Oh, really? (Benson takes the phone away from Pops and begins talking, sarcastically) Hello?

Mordecai:: Benson, you got to help us! We're stuck in 1982!

Benson:: Oh wow! That's really something, Mordecai.

Mordecai:: Crap, he thinks we're pranking him!

Rigby:: What?! Give me that! (Rigby shouts down the phone) The 80s called, they want their cell phones back!

(Pops, Benson and also Skips are sucked into the phone and are sent to Mordecai and Rigby's 1982 through phone space, landing on the back of the golf cart)

Benson:: What just happened?!

Mordecai:: We need your help to prank the Master Prank Caller.

Benson:: Who?

Skips:: Why did you prank him?

(Phone rings and Benson picks up this time)

Benson:: I'll take care of this. Hello?

Master Prank Caller: Nice ride... But I like mine better.

(MPC summons a limo, which he is driving beside the golf cart)

Master Prank Caller: Blargh!

(The park workers scream and the Master Prank Caller tries to ram them off the road)

Skips:: Forget the phone, hold the wheel steady!

(Skips jumps onto the Master Prank Caller's limo. He tears the hood ornament from the back, jumps to the front of the limo and smashes it onto the engine. Skips jumps back to the golf cart as the Master Prank Caller's limo flips several times. The Master Prank Caller escapes from his crashed car and begins to dial himself, causing the phone in the cart to ring again)

Mordecai:: Don't answer it, don't answer!

Skips:: Mordecai! Look out!

(Mordecai runs over younger Pops, who is crossing the street with one of the phones)

Rigby:: Dude, we just hit past Pops!

(Pops rises, moans briefly, and lets out a manic laugh, much like his present self)

(Mordecai, Rigby, Benson, Pops, and Skips crash into the 80s Electronic Store, where they come to rest next to a counter full of answering machines)

Clerk: Uh, can I help you with anything?

Mordecai:: Dude. I got an idea.

(The scene cuts back to the park where the characters a running to the field getting ready to hide)

Mordecai:: Quick, get to the field! Everybody hide! (The answering machine trap is deployed) Over there!

(Mordecai and Rigby put down the phone attached to a tape recorder and then hide in the bushes)

Mordecai:: Man, I hope this works.

Rigby:: It will, Mordecai. It has to.

(The phone rings. The tape recorder turns on with a recording of Mordecai's voice)

Voice of Mordecai: Hello?

Master Prank Caller: This is The Master Prank Caller telling you--

Voice of Mordecai: Hello?

Master Prank Caller: I said this is The Master Prank--

Voice of Mordecai: Hello? uh.. I'm sorry, I can't hear you.

Master Prank Caller: I said this is The Master Prank Caller!

Voice of Mordecai: Hello, hello, are you there?

Master Prank Caller: RRRRGH! (The Master Prank Caller appears next to the phone and tape recorder) I SAID-- (Realizes that the voice is coming from a recorder - he's been psyched)

Voice of Mordecai: Ha ha! Just kidding. You just got pranked, loser! (Recording stops)

Master Prank Caller: NOOOOOOO--!!!

Mordecai: Now! (Mordecai, Rigby, Skips, Pops and Benson jump out of the bushes and make a dog pile on the Master Prank Caller, holding him down)

Mordecai: Now, Rigby, hit the power button!

Rigby:: Who's the best prank caller now, jerk-dish?! (Rigby climbs up the phone and hits the power button)

Master Prank Caller: No! NO! NOOOOO--!!! (Shut down, the MPC falls to the ground and makes no movement)

Mordecai and Rigby: (they laughs) In your face! Who's the master prank caller now, you loser?! (laughs again)

(A light shines out from the MPC's speaker. Mordecai and Rigby look in)

Mordecai: Guys, this is it, it's the way back! Come on!

(The park workers appear in a hallway with doors that each have a different year on them)

Mordecai: One of these doors leads us back to the present.

(Benson then spots the present door)

Benson:: There it is.

(Benson, Skips, and Pops walk through the door, but as Mordecai and Rigby are about to go through, they see the Master Prank Caller)

Master Prank Caller: Wait. (MPC's speaker breaks, revealing his true identity - a thin, undead-looking man) You guys were better than me today, but you can't leave me here. All I ever wanted to do was make prank calls like you. Was that so wrong? (The Master Prank Caller splutters and moans. Mordecai and Rigby look at each other)

(Cuts to Benson's apartment where he receives a call)

Benson:: Hello?

Mordecai, Rigby & the Master Prank Caller: (To each other) 1, 2, 3! (Into the phone) The 70s called: they want their chair back! (Benson's chair disappear. Cuts to Mordecai, Rigby and the Master Prank Caller laughing at their prank)


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