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Sad Sax/Transcript

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OOOOOOOHHHHHHH!
This page is the transcript for "Sad Sax".


(The episode begins with a depressed Mordecai trekking on the partly snowy ground. Mordecai sighs and drops on a pile of snow flashbacking his kiss with Margaret and the moment CJ runs out the door from the Christmas party)

Mordecai: Man, I hate mistletoe.

(The scene cuts to Mordecai at the coffeshop. The coffeshop door opens and CJ begins the enter)

Mordecai: Uhhh, hey CJ. Thanks for coming.

(They both sit down)

Mordecai: It's great to see you. How's your week been going?

CJ: So you wanted to tell me something?

Mordecai: Oh uh right, one sec....(he pulls out some presents for her) I got you something.

(CJ takes a giant piece of candy shaped like a butt saying "SORRY I'M SUCH A BUTT" Mordecai hands her a tape)

Mordecai: And I made this mix tape.

(The title of the tape says " SORRY I'M SUCH A BUTT")

Mordecai: All of the songs are apologies.

CJ: I'll listen to them in the car.

(A short silence occurs)

Mordecai and CJ: Look I wanted to....

Mordecai: Augh! CJ, I'm really sorry! I don't know what happened.

CJ: You don't? (souding sarcastic) Because I can refresh your memory.

Mordecai: No, no. I just mean it was crazy. It didn't mean anything, I swear. Margaret and I.. all that stuff is in the past. It was just.. it was midnight and we were under a mistletoe, I was bound by mistletoe rules. I think that's a real law in some countries. (He turns his head) Eileen, back me up on this.

(Eileen shakes her head and runs away, not wanting to get involved.)

CJ: Mordecai, what you did was really lame. It took me this whole week to start feeling like I could look at your face without wanting to break a chair over it.

Mordecai: Understandable. (while nodding his head)

CJ: But if your being honest about this mistletoe thing I mean, I missed you. I feel like I'm ready to forgive and forget.

Mordecai: Phew.

CJ: As long as you swear there's nothing going on with you and Margaret.

Mordecai: I swear, honest. I just want things to go back to how they were before.

CJ: Yeah, me too.

(They both reach out to hold hands. Just then, the song from Butt Dial is heard and a selfie of Mordecai and Margaret appeared on Mordecai's phone)

CJ: Margaret? (She turns dark and becomes angered) Oh in the past, huh?!

Mordecai: I thought it was.

CJ: Then why is she calling you?!

Mordecai: I don't know! Why IS she calling me?

(Mordecai immediantly picks up his phone to end the call and CJ throws the bouquet of flowers on the table)

CJ: NICE CUSTOM RINGTONE, YOU JERK!! (She runs out the door)

Mordecai: CJ, WAIT!

(Mordecai is again seen depressed and sighed, he heard some saxophone music and saw a man on a bridge playing his saxophone with the moon in the background. He notices Mordecai.)

Sad Sad Guy: Oh hey, Mordecai. I haven't seen you in a couple of days, how're you doin'?

Mordecai: Hey Sad Sax Guy, what're you doing here?

(He jumps off the bridge and lands near Mordecai while playing some dramatic saxophone music)

Sad Sax Guy: I go whenever I needed. Let me guess, girl problems?

Mordecai: Actually yeah, how'd you know?

Sad Sax Guy: Brother, they don't call me Sad Sax Guy just because I play the sax and cry a lot. I know a broken heart when I see one, you tell me all about it and let's see if we could get this mess sorted out.

Mordecai: Well, I was at this party and...

Sad Sax Guy: Aaahh... mistletoe incident. Say no more, bro, I know all about it. I'll tell you what? Because I'm a man of romance, I'm gonna get you two back together.

Mordecai: You are? How?

Sad Sax Guy: I know a guy. He'll hook you up.

(He hands him a card in his sax saying "Bowler Hat Singing Apology Gram" with the number. Cut to CJ's apartment. CJ is reading a book when she hears the doorbell. She goes to answer, and the bowler hat guy is there.)

Telegram Guy: (singing) Ohhh, here's a singing telegram, apology and song. Mordecai was quite a jerk, he knows he did you wrong. But let's be fair, he....

(CJ stops him, unamused.)

CJ: Ok, ok. Hold on a sec. Do you know what he actually did to me?

Telegram Guy: Well, they don't give us that information, ma'am.

(Mordecai is watching the conversation from a bush. CJ leaves and the telegram guy looks at Mordecai. The two approach each other.)

Mordecai: So, did it work?

(The telegram guy slaps Mordecai in the face.)

Telegram Guy: You disgust me.

(He walks off, beginning to sing. Cut to Mordecai and Sad Sax Guy at the Snack Bar in the Park.)

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