(We begin on a shot of the moon in the sky. The camera pans down to the house where two kids dressed in costumes walk up to the front door. One kid rings the doorbell, and Muscle Man, in a green beast mask, opens the door and tries to scare them. The two kids hold out their bags.)
Muscle Man: You gotta scream first, bro.
Kid 1: But we're not scared.
Muscle Man: (removes the beast mask) Do you want the candy or not?
(The two kids scream, drop their bags, and run away.)
Muscle Man: That's... that's what I thought. (He closes the door and joins his friends in the living room.) Alright, we're closing up shop. No more trick-or-treaters.
Benson: So, what do you guys wanna do? The night is still young. I got a cat sitter, so I can be out for at least another hour.
Muscle Man: I've got an idea, bro. (He turns off the light) Scary stories!
Mordecai: (turning the light back on) Dude, we do that every year.
Rigby: Yeah, let's do something really scary.
Skips: Well, we can rent a few genre films.
Pops: Or we could go to bed early, and be alone with our thoughts.
Rigby: Nah, let's go to a haunted house. Those are the scariest.
Muscle Man: You know who else is the scariest? (He turns off the light) MY MOM!
Mordecai: (turning the light back on) Augh! Not this again.
Muscle Man: No, dudes, she's seriously scary like a haunted house.
Rigby: Yeah, yeah, just like how she eats raw acorns?
Muscle Man: Uh-huh.
Skips: Or that she swam across the ocean with one arm tied behind her back?
Muscle Man: Yep.
Mordecai: Or that she's a registered notary public?
Muscle Man: Yeah, it's all true, bro. Everyone knows all the best comedy is based on truth.
Rigby: Prooooove iiiiiiit!
Muscle Man: What?
Mordecai and Rigby: Proooooove iiiiiiit!
Muscle Man: Woah, let's just slow down and...
Benson: Come to think of it, I've never seen your mom.
Hi-Five Ghost: Yeah, me neither.
Muscle Man: Well, she doesn't really like visitors, so...
Mordecai: What? Even Fives hasn't met her?
Rigby: Now we have to do it!
Muscle Man: What are you angling at, bro?
Mordecai: If your mom is so amazing, let's meet her.
(Everyone starts begging)
Muscle Man: Listen, I think I'm getting tired. (starts sweating) I'm just gonna go home.
Mordecai and Rigby: Booooooooooooooo!
(Everyone starts begging again)
Muscle Man: Augh! Fine! I'll take you to meet my mom on one condition. (He turns off the light) You gotta tell scary stories the whole way there.
(Circle-wipe transfers to the middle of the road, Muscle Man is driving with the guys in his car)
Muscle Man: Alright, chumps, who's first?
Pops: Oh, I have a story.
The Hole (as told by Pops)Edit
(The house is filled with Halloween decorations, Mordecai is in his Earth costume, and Rigby is in his Uranus costume. Mordecai is getting some fruit punch)
Rigby: Augh! This party! I hate dressing like this.
Mordecai: That's only because you chose Uranus. Ha ha. ha.
Rigby: It was the only one that fit!
(Muscle Man is in his Mars costume, and Pops is in his sun costume)
Muscle Man: So I said, "That's not your back scratcher, that's my toothbrush!"
(He and Pops laugh)
Pops: It's true, you did say that to me.
Muscle Man: Yeah, we both remember.
(A bell sound is heard, and Skips, in his Jupiter costume, stops licking his lollipop)
Skips: It's time.
(Cut to the living room where Benson, in his Saturn costume, is ringing a bell and standing in front of a pumpkin bucket.)
Benson: So, like you all know, as per tradition, we pull our names out of this pumpkin bucket, and whoever's last, it's their turn.
Pops: Please, we don't have to do this. Remember what happened to Hi-Five Ghost?
Benson: It's all right, Pops. Maybe it's really fun in there. Let us begin.
(Skips starts tapping a bongo drum.)
Benson: And the first name is... (He pulls a slip of paper from the bucket and unfolds it) ...Skips.
(Skips nods his head.)
Benson: Muscle Man.
Muscle Man: Ha-ha, yeah! (He pulls his hand into his Mars costume, tears off his underwear, and swings it around.) Whoo-hoo!
(Pops and Rigby look at each other nervously.)
Benson: (pulls another slip of paper) Be-- Oh, that's me. Ha! Boy, what a relief. Well, two more left.
Rigby: (covering his ears and groaning in worry)
Rigby: (squealing) Pops is right! We don't need to do this!
Benson: (reading from another slip of paper) Rigby.
Rigby: Whew! Sucks to be you, Pops.
Pops: No, please listen. We can just leave the park.
Muscle Man: We don't know what's out there, bro.
Skips: Sorry, Pops.
Benson: This is the only way to ensure our safety!
(Benson tries to restrain Pops, but Pops dodges, and Benson falls over toward the others. They look toward the open door and Pops' discarded sun costume.)
Benson: Where'd he go?!
(Cut to Pops running through the forest. The others run after him while making primitive whooping noises. Mordecai catches up with Pops first.)
Mordecai: There he is!
(As he runs, Pops steps on a twig and is caught in a net trap.)
Mordecai: Get him down from there, Uranus.
Rigby: (muttering in mockery)
(The park workers lead Pops to a toothed hole in the ground surrounded by skeletons. Pops falls over near the hole.)
Mordecai: There it is.
(Pops looks down into the hole as it makes gurgling sounds. The hole spits out Hi Five Ghost's skeleton)
Benson: We do this every year, Pops, and every year we stay alive. Therefore, this must be why we're alive.
Pops: Please, just let me say my piece.
Benson: Fine. You've got one minute. But then we're throwing you in that hole. (He sets a stopwatch for one minute)
Pops: Look at what we've become -- tearing at each other like animals. And not the gentle kind. But ever since that fog appeared, we've been feeding each other to this hole. Look me in the eye and remember the times before the raffle. (His eyes start to water) The times before the hole.
(The park workers briefly look at each other.)
Benson: Pops, I think I speak for us all when I say... (He shoves Pops) ...get in the hole!
(Pops screams as he falls into the hole, but his head is too large to fit, so he's just a head sticking out of the ground.)
Benson: Huh. Well, I guess I could...
(Benson stomps on Pops' head to push him down, but he doesn't budge. Because of Pops' giant head plugging its mouth, the hole chokes to death.)
(Title card: 6 MONTHS LATER)
(The park workers all have brunch around the ground-stuck Pops.)
Muscle Man: So I said, "That's not your back scratcher..."
Everyone: "...That's my toothbrush!" (laughing)
(Rigby feeds tea to Pops.)
Pops: Say, where did you get this wonderful tea?
Mordecai: Oh, well... This is actually kind of embarrassing but, uh... We were able to leave the park and nothing bad happened. (sips tea)
Benson: Turns out the fog was all in our minds. It was really more of a psychological, existential kind of fog.
Skips: I guess you could say the fog represented our fear of the outside world.
Pops: Well, how about that?
(Ripple transition back to Muscle Man's car. End of "The Hole")
Pops: I call it "The Wonderful Adventure of the Mysterious Hole in the Park".
Muscle Man: No offense, Pops, but I said scary stories, not reimaginings of classic literature. Maybe I should turn around and go home.
Mordecai: Aw, come on, Muscle Man! You said if we told scary stories, we'd get to meet your mom!
Muscle Man: You know who else can't handle the truth about their lame story?
(Everyone starts begging again)
Benson: Fine. I've got a scary story. This story is about two of my favorite people...
Unfinished Business (as told by Benson)Edit
(The scene opens on Mordecai and Rigby's funeral. Benson is giving the eulogy while Skips, Hi Five Ghost, Muscle Man, and Thomas listen.)
Benson: Mordecai and Rigby are dead. Their lives ended tragically while doing what should have been a simple job — haunting the house for Halloween. I did everything I could to motivate them: pep talks, instructional speeches, occasional yelling. I even tried taking away their precious video games. But it was never enough. They were never able to finish haunting the house.
Muscle Man: Oh, no, bro. Can I see you after this sparsely attended service?
(Circle-wipe to a small clearing, where Benson meets with Muscle Man and Skips.)
Benson: What's this all about? I've got a four o'clock at four o'clock.
Muscle Man: You have to fire Mordecai and Rigby.
Benson: Muscle Man, I don't know how to say this, but you were just at their memorial. I had you personally dig their graves.
Muscle Man: Ugh. Look at the house!
(The house is seen looking scary, with wind blowing and window shutters opening and closing.)
Benson: That's just the wind.
Skips: Mordecai and Rigby have unfinished business. If you don't fire them, they will haunt the house forever.
Muscle Man: Ghost rules, bro.
Benson: Fine. (looks at the house determined) I'll fire Mordecai and Rigby...
(Thunder strikes as Benson enters the house.)
Benson: (talking to himself) Come on, Benson. This is what you were born to do.
(Down the hallway, the ghosts of Mordecai and Rigby stand still with their backs turned. An eerie green glow surrounds their bodies.)
Benson: They are so fired. (He walks up to them) Mordecai and Rigby, you're—
(Scary faces pop out of the backs of Mordecai and Rigby's heads. Benson falls over scared, and Mordecai and Rigby float away into the kitchen laughing. Benson stands up, dusts himself off, and follows them. He hears their laughing coming from the ceiling fan.)
Benson: Mordecai and Rigby, I can hear you up there! You two are officially—
(Rigby falls from the ceiling and breaks the kitchen table. A giant mouth in Rigby's stomach roars at Benson.)
Benson: (screams and runs away) So scary!
(A scene transition shows a calendar moving from October to November. Benson sits in the house hallway with stubble on his chin.)
Benson: Gotta fire 'em... Just gotta fire 'em...
(The ghosts of Mordecai and Rigby pass by Benson and enter his office, phasing into his desk. Benson follows. He opens a desk drawer and sees tiny versions of Mordecai and Rigby.)
Benson: Enough messing around!
(Tiny Mordecai and Rigby start floating around Benson.)
Ghost Mordecai and Rigby:: Hmm. Hmm-hmm-hmm. Hmm-hmm.
(Benson tries to catch them, but he fails. When he land on top of his desk, he tries to swat them like flies. They phase under his skin and crawl up his arm, eventually phasing out of his body through his eyes. Benson falls over. Another calendar scene transition goes from November to December. Benson runs up the stairs as Mordecai, with two rows of teeth, roars and chases after him like a dog. Calendar transition goes from December to January. A tired Benson walks through the hall.)
Benson: Gotta fire 'em...
(Mordecai's ghost taps on Benson's shoulder. Benson turns around, and Mordecai scares him when Rigby appears in his mouth. Behind Benson, Rigby's ghost, wearing pants, scares him by pulling his pants down and mooning him. Rigby's butt looks like his and Mordecai's shrieking faces. Benson falls over and whimpers in fear while Mordecai and Rigby float away into a hall closet. Benson runs after them and opens the closet, but it's empty.)
(When he turns around, Mordecai and Rigby have fused into a big, blob-like monster that roars at him.)
Benson: (screams and falls over backward) So... So scary...
(Benson looks down the hall and spots Mordecai and Rigby's video game console.)
Benson: Their video games!
(Benson hooks up the console in the living room, turns it on, and hides. Mordecai and Rigby's laughing ghosts enter and pick up the game controllers.)
Benson: Hook, line, and sinker...! (runs in front of the TV) You're fired!
(Mordecai and Rigby start shrieking at Benson.)
Benson: No, why?! Why aren't they gone?! Wait.
(Flashback to Mr. Maellard and a young Benson in Benson's office.)
Mr. Maellard: I don't know much about these newfangled computers, but I do know one thing — a worker is not technically fired until you delete them from the employee database.
(The flashback ends.)
Benson: The employee database!
(Benson runs up the stairs while Mordecai and Rigby continue scaring him.)
Benson: Ohhhh... No! How long are these stairs...?
(Benson reaches his office and sees everything in it swirling around in the air. His computer monitor shows the employee database. Benson jumps up and "swims" through the air toward the computer. Mordecai and Rigby appear to scare him again with multiple eyes, rows of teeth, and long wrapped tongues.)
Benson: So scary!
(Benson pushes them out of the way and reaches the keyboard. Mordecai and Rigby appear again as several pop-ups on the screen.)
Benson: Aah! So scary!
(Benson finally deletes Mordecai and Rigby from the employee database, and everything in the office falls to the floor.)
Benson: (He stands up) I did it!
(A green glow starts covering Benson's body.)
Benson: What's... What's going on?! Aah!
(Mordecai and Rigby, no longer ghosts, walk up to him.)
Mordecai: You're dead, dude.
Rigby: Yeah, man. You don't remember?
(In another flashback, Benson hangs Halloween decorations on a ladder at the top of the stairs. Mordecai, holding up the beast mask, and Rigby walk up.)
Mordecai: Benson, look at this mask!
(Benson falls down the stairs and dies. His ghost leaves his body.)
Rigby (voiceover): You've been haunting the house for months.
(Benson's ghost scares Rigby while he's eating cereal. When Rigby screams, Benson flees as if he's also scared. The same happens with Mordecai while he's carrying a box up the stairs. Cut to Mordecai and Rigby in the hallway, with Rigby trying to open a bottle of soda.)
Rigby: No, dude. It's "lefty locky, righty relaxy".
Mordecai: That doesn't even rhyme!
(Benson's ghost appears again. It sees Mordecai and Rigby and moans in fright as he leaves. The flashback ends.)
Benson: Then what are you guys doing here? You've ruined my office!
Mordecai: We're not in your office. This is our office.
Rigby: We got promoted!
Mordecai: And this isn't our office. (screen zooms out from Mordecai's face) It's a cemetery.
(Lightning strikes as Mordecai points down.)
Mordecai: And that's your grave!
(Cut to Benson's tombstone, which reads "R.I.P. BENSON. 'YOU'RE FIRED'". Benson falls to his knees next to his tombstone.)
(Ripple transition back to Muscle Man's car, where Benson looks pleased with himself. End of "Unfinished Business")
Rigby: Is that it?
Benson: Yes, that's it. I was dead the whole time. Scary, right?
Mordecai: Dude, that twist's been done, like, a million times.
Benson: What are you talking about? It's way creepier that way!
(Everyone is unimpressed)
Muscle Man: I saw that ending coming the whole time!
Benson: Muscle Man, how long 'til we get there?
Muscle Man: It's gonna be about...
(The car screeches to a halt.)
Muscle Man: ...now.
(The car is stopped in front of Mountain Valley Estates, a trailer park. An oil drum fire burns just next to the gate.)
Muscle Man: All right, ladies. (He unlocks the gate) I hope you brought your adult diapers, 'cause you're gonna need them after either "A" -- this really difficult hike -- or "B" -- once you meet my mom.
(Muscle Man laughs evilly as the camera pans up to a lone trailer on top of a hill and thunder crashes. End of "Terror Tales of the Park IV, Part 1")
(Muscle Man leads Mordecai, Rigby, Skips, Pops, Benson, and Hi Five Ghost through a forest. Rigby nervously eats trail mix as an owl looks down at him from a tree branch.)
Rigby: Aah! (falls over and covers his head)
(The owl flies away.)
Muscle Man: You know who doesn't drop their trail mix when they get scared? My mom! (He high-fives Hi Five Ghost)
Rigby: Ugh! How far is it to your mom's place anyway?
Muscle Man: We'll get there when we get there! Do you want to meet the woman who brought me into this world or not?
Benson: We didn't come all this way just to turn back now.
Rigby: But, like, if you had to just give a rough estimate of how far?
Muscle Man: It'd go a lot faster with another scary story, bro.
Mordecai: Augh! Duuuude!
Rigby: No, Mordecai, it's okay. I got this one. Hold my trail mix. (He hands his bag of trail mix to Mordecai) I'm gonna tell a story that covers every freaky thing you can think of!
Muscle Man: ...I'll allow it.
Rigby: It was a scary movie night like any other. We were watching "Heads, You're Dead" on the couch.
Scary Movie Night (as told by Rigby)Edit
(Mordecai, CJ, Eileen, and Rigby sit on the living room couch watching "Heads, You're Dead". In the movie, an escaped convict stands in front of a toll booth operator.)
Convict: Heads, I win. Tails, you're dead!
Toll booth operator: (cowering in fear) No! No! No!
(The convict laughs evilly as he flips a coin. As the coin travels up, the man's laughter becomes low and distorted, and the coin turns into a crow and flies away. Title card: "Directed by SHANK NUTKIN". The movie ends.)
Eileen: I thought it was provocative, leaving the end ambiguous so the viewer is forced to reckon with her own assumptions.
Rigby: Oh, if you want to see something provocative... (He pulls out a video cassette labeled "Triple Threat" from under the couch cushions) ...then check this out! In my hands, I hold the scariest movie ever made!
Mordecai: Pffft. Doubt it.
Rigby: No, dude, the internet says. There's a whole backstory and everything. It was a stormy night in the '70s when a VHS marketing team was working late.
(Thunder crashes. Flashback to the '70s, outside the VHEssence Distribution building. Three executives sit at a small table in a lounge.)
Executive #1: All right, guys. This is our last hope. If the VHS we release isn't the scariest thing on the market, this company's going under.
Executive #2: Okay, okay. What about... werewolves? (She holds out a VHS cover labeled "Wolf Woods") Hack-and-slash brings in the cash.
Dale Sanders: Great idea... if teenagers actually had any money. It's their parents we should be selling to. (He holds up a VHS cover labeled "The Barber") And they want classy. Restrained.
Executive #1: (sighing) If someone wants to watch a black-and-white movie, they'll do it at the ancient history museum, Dale! (He holds up a VHS cover labeled "微笑み (smile.)") It's gotta be cutting-edge. One word, two syllables -- Japan.
Rigby (voiceover): They had no idea that ball lightning was heading straight towards them!
(A ball of lightning falls from the sky toward the building.)
Executive #2: What's that heading towards us?
(Executive #2 points out the window, and Executive #1 and Dale look outside to see the ball lightning.)
Executive #1: Ball lightning!
(The three executives jump out of the way as the ball lightning crashes through the window. When the smoke clears, a video cassette that looks like three cassette pieces sewn together lies on the floor. It's labeled "Triple Threat". Dale picks up the cassette.)
Dale Sanders: This... This is it! The scary movie that'll save our company!
(Cut back to Rigby on the couch.)
Rigby: But it didn't save the company. They put the tape in, just as you would any tape not created by ball lightning fusion, and it sucked them into the movie!
Rigby: Legend has it that no one's ever survived to see the end, which is why it only cost $1.99 with free shipping. Ohhhhhhhh!
Mordecai: Dude, come on. There's no way that story's true.
Eileen: Yeah, really. Sucked into the tape? That's not even that scary-sounding.
Rigby: Hey, fine. If you don't think your lives are in danger, then there's no reason not to watch it, right?
CJ: We don't have anything better to do. Play the tape, Rigby!
Rigby: This is gonna be awesome! Hope everybody brought backup underpants.
(Rigby puts the tape in the VCR and sits back down on the couch.)
(On the TV screen, the logos for "Wolf Woods", "The Barber", and "微笑み (smile.)" merge to form the bloody logo for "Triple Threat". The first part of the movie, "Wolf Woods", begins on a shot of the full moon as a wolf howls off-screen. In front of a house, two teenagers make out.)
Hellen: Do you have a feeling like we're being watched?
Freddy: Trust me, we're the only ones out here.
(Something growls off-screen.)
Hellen and Freddy: (They hold each other close) What was that?!
(Close-up of a creature's red eyes in a bush. The growling gets louder. Hellen and Freddy scream in terror as the camera pans up to a shot of a city and the movie turns black and white. Zoom in on a barbershop, where someone inside turns the "OPEN" sign over to "CLOSED (DUE TO INSANITY)". The unseen barber approaches a man sitting in a chair.)
Barber: So glad to see you again, sir. My client list has been dwindling of late.
(The barber casts a shadow on the wall as he holds up a pair of scissors.)
Wyatt: Uh... I-I-I just... (He hears a girl off-screen speaking in Japanese) I didn't know you had a daughter.
Barber: I don't.
(Distorted scene transition to a playground. A Japanese schoolgirl sits on a swing.)
Schoolgirl: Watashi to asobou yo. Anata ga inakute sabishii.
(A group of schoolgirls skips across the playground and they notice the girl. She turns to them with big anime-esque eyes. The other schoolgirls scream in terror. Cut to Mordecai and the others on the couch.)
Mordecai: This movie's super-lame, dude.
CJ: Why's everybody being so dumb?
Eileen: Yeah, you see a threat and you run, people.
Rigby: Sorry, guys. I guess it was just cheap 'cause it sucked.
(Lightning strikes, and the power in the house goes out. Everyone screams.)
Eileen: The power's out!
Mordecai: Then how's the VCR still on?
(The VCR still has power and reads 9:25 PM.)
Rigby: Man, the guy at the yard sale said this thing was gonna outlive us all. (He looks inside the cassette port) Huh.
(A clawed hand reaches out of the VCR and grabs Rigby by the neck. Three additional hands grab CJ, Eileen, and Mordecai. CJ and Eileen scream.)
Mordecai: I think the story's true!
(The four of them get pulled into the VCR and end up in a forest.)
Rigby: Whoa. This is awesome! I told you we'd get sucked in and now we're sucked in!
Mordecai: Dude, this isn't awesome! We're stuck in a horror movie!
Rigby: Three horror movies!
CJ: And we're not the only ones.
(CJ discovers the skeletal remains of Executive #2 and Dale Sanders. She looks at Dale's company ID card.)
CJ: VHEssence Distribution? I guess they never did figure out how to save the company.
Eileen: Weren't there three of them?
(Behind the four friends, a werewolf loots the dead body of Executive #1. He looks over at them while taking money from the executive's wallet. The four scream and run away, and the werewolf chases after them. They run into a house, and Mordecai slams the door in the werewolf's face. Inside the house, the windows are boarded up, and the furniture is covered in tarps. Eileen sits on the floor and rocks back and forth.)
Eileen: I'm sorry I abused my power when I was a hall monitor! I'm sorry I intentionally didn't return that prism to the lab! I'm sorry I--
Hellen: Do you hear something?
Freddy: No, babe. I can only hear our love for each other.
Eileen: What was that?
Rigby: It sounded like it came from the closet.
Mordecai: No, dude! Don't!
(Rigby opens the closet door, and Hellen and Freddy are inside making out. They stop and turn to the four friends.)
Rigby: It's those teenagers from the movie.
(There's a pounding and snarling at the door, and the friends gasp.)
CJ: We've gotta get out of here.
Freddy: Yeah, you guys should totally go. Six is a crowd, right, baby?
Mordecai: What?! No! That's how you die! Don't you get it?! We just have to make it to the end of the movie!
Werewolf: (from behind the door) Package delivery.
Hellen: It's a trick. Leave it on the doorstep!
Werewolf: Uh... It needs a signature.
Hellen: Oh, well, in that case... (She walks toward the door)
Hellen: But it could be my special-order legwarmers! I don't want to have to go pick them up at the warehouse.
(Hellen opens the door, and there's no one there.)
Werewolf: I'm back here, in the bushes.
Hellen: Oh, okay. (She approaches the bushes) I don't have a pen on me.
(A pair of clawed hands reach out and pull Hellen into the bushes. She screams.)
Freddy: Hey! She's my ride home, buddy!
(Freddy runs out and jumps into the bushes. There are sounds of growling and tearing.)
(Mordecai, CJ, and Eileen turn to Rigby, who's standing by the house's back door.)
Rigby: Come on! Now's our chance while he's busy chowing down on those chumps!
(Mordecai, Rigby, CJ, and Eileen exit through the back door and run into the woods. They slide down a small dirt slope.
(They end up in front of Screeching Gables Asylum, and the movie turns black-and-white. Mordecai opens the doors, and they run inside.)
Rigby: Oh, man...
(Wyatt is seen trying to free himself from a straitjacket.)
Eileen: Oh, no! Inmate!
Wyatt: (He pulls off the straitjacket and laughs) I'm not an inmate. My name's Wyatt. I'm just here for a haircut.
Mordecai: Why would you come to a mental asylum for a haircut?
Wyatt: Well, my barber told me to meet him here. Hmm. Made sense at the time.
(The asylum's front doors slam shut.)
(Mordecai points to a trail of hair leading down the hall. The barber casts a shadow on the wall, laughing maniacally and holding up a pair of scissors. Mordecai, Rigby, CJ, Eileen, and Wyatt scream and retreat up the stairs, and the barber follows. They stop in the asylum's morgue.)
Eileen: And somehow this just got creepier.
(Mordecai, Rigby, CJ, and Eileen run toward the window, but Wyatt stops.)
Eileen: Come on, Wyatt! What are you waiting for?!
Wyatt: (He looks at his reflection in a mirror) He might not be trying to kill us. And I really need a haircut...
Mordecai: What?! You look fine! Let's just go!
Wyatt: (He backs up into the hallway) No. He might be cool. I'm gonna chance it! (He runs toward the barber)
Eileen: Wyatt, no!
(Wyatt and the barber's shadows are cast on the wall.)
Barber: What'll it be, sir?
Wyatt: Just a little off the top.
Barber: You got it! (laughing maniacally)
(Wyatt's severed head rolls into the morgue.)
Wyatt: How does it look?
(Mordecai, Rigby, CJ, and Eileen scream.)
Wyatt: Oh, come on. It's not that bad, is it?
(CJ and Rigby try to open the window, but they're unable to. CJ looks hopeless.)
CJ: That's it. We're done. There's no way out of this madhouse.
Wyatt: You guys could just use that door over there.
(Mordecai, Rigby, CJ, and Eileen see an open door next to the closed window.)
Mordecai: Let's go!
(They immediately run through it and fall screaming into an old Japanese village.)
Rigby: Oh, great. Now who's that?!
(A young Japanese schoolgirl plays on the seesaw by herself. Another schoolgirl walks up to her.)
Kimiko: You must be very lonely. Everyone is afraid of you because you're different. You just want someone to play with.
(The schoolgirl on the seesaw cries tears and smiles. She stands up and joins hands with Kimiko.)
Kimiko: I will play with you! Our friendship will be a butterfly floating on the breeze of--
(The schoolgirl's mouth covers Kimiko's body and she eats her whole. She looks at Mordecai and the others.)
School Girl Villain: Do you want to play too?
(Mordecai and the others scream and run away. As they run, the Japanese village fades into a black and purple landscape with text on the ground and walls.)
Eileen: Wake up, Eileen! Wake up!
CJ: I'll never forgive you for playing this movie, Rigby!
Rigby: Hey, I thought it would be fun!
Eileen: Wait a second. What's this?
Mordecai: It looks like a bunch of names and titles?
Rigby: "Best boy grip"? What's that?
Eileen: We're in the credits! We must be near the end!
CJ: Well, if the movie's over, then we're out of danger, right?
Rigby: Uh, CJ?
(Rigby points to a ball of lightning surging behind CJ.)
Rigby: Ball lightning!
(CJ runs and jumps out of the way of the ball lightning's electric zap, leaving her boots behind. The zap leaves the boots slightly burnt.)
Eileen: Those really are all-weather boots.
(Mordecai and the others run away from the ball lightning as it chases them through the movie's credits, dodging its electrical attacks.)
Rigby: Look! Up ahead! (He points to the VCR's cassette port) It's the end of the movie! Ha-ha! Finally!
(The ball lightning zaps at Rigby, and he falls over.)
(Rigby whimpers in fear at the ball lightning. Eileen pulls off the cassette port's metal flap.)
Eileen: No lightning can resist metal!
(Eileen sticks the metal sheet in the ground, and the ball lightning's zap is attracted to it like a lightning rod. Eileen gets zapped.)
Eileen: Okay, that kinda hurt.
Mordecai: Hurry! The way out!
(Rigby supports Eileen as they continue running toward the exit. The ball lightning zaps at them one more time, and they jump out of the VCR, landing in a pile of cassette filmstrip.
Rigby: You guys okay?
Mordecai: (coughing and groaning) Yeah.
Eileen: I gotta admit, that movie was pretty cool.
CJ: Yeah, but not as cool as ball lightning fusing all of our butt cheeks together.
(The screen zooms out to show that Mordecai, Rigby, CJ, and Eileen have been fused together at the butt cheeks. Mordecai, CJ, and Eileen laugh.)
Rigby: NOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU, "TRIPLE THREAT"!
(Cut back to Rigby and the others in the forest. End of "Scary Movie Night")
Rigby: Oh no! I got Eileen's arm! And she's got my leg! And Mordecai's got my face! The End! You're welcome!
Skips: Well, that was uncomfortable.
Muscle Man: I had no idea you were such an expert on lightning balls.
Rigby: Ball Lightning! It's a thing!
Muscle Man: Whatever, dude! We're here. (screen pans over to Muscle Man's mom's trailer, howling is heard)
Mordecai: This is where your mom lives?
Benson: Are you surprised?
Rigby: Let's just meet her and get out of here, this place is creeping me out!
Muscle Man: In a minute. I've gotta go in first and tell her she's got company. She doesn't take too kindly to surprise visitors.
Pops: Oh no? But her halloween decorations are so lovely! (the screen shows some gravestones next to her trailer)
Muscle Man: Those aren't decorations.
(Pops is worried)
Muscle Man: You guys stay here! (he runs into Muscle Man's mom's trailer)
Benson: This better not be another one of his pranks!
(the trailer's door creaks open)
Muscle Man: Alright! She's ready for you!
(the guys enter the trailer)
Mordecai: Muscle Man? Mrs. Sorrenstein?
(knocking is heard behind a shutter on a window, Benson opens the shutter but nothing is there)
Benson: Hmm, nobody's there.
(a green face wearing a hockey mask pops up behind the window, everybody screams)
Mordecai: Aw, weak Muscle Man! I knew this was a prank!
Muscle Man: (walks through door) What prank?
Muscle Man: (laughs) Oh, man! I got you guys! I got you good! This isn't my mom's house! You really think she'd live in this dump? I had this all planned out! That's just Muscle Bro! He was waiting here the whole time!
(Muscle Bro walks in)
Muscle Bro: Someone call me?
Muscle Man: If that's not you, then who is that? (Muscle Man shines a light at the window)
Female Voice: You know who else likes scaring people? (she takes the mask off, it is revealed to be Muscle Man's mom) Me! (she jumps through the window) Aargh!
(everybody runs out, Muscle Man's mom smashes through the trailer door)
Muscle Mom: Wait, Mitchy! You forgot your candy! (she eats some candy) Happy Halloween! (she howls, then unzips a costume, revealing that she is the same size as Muscle Man) Ha! This costume gets my boys every year!