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|"The Unicorns Have Got to Go"|
|Season 1, Episode 8|
|Premiere date:||October 25, 2010|
|Directed by:||Mike Roth|
"Grilled Cheese Deluxe"
Mordecai accidentally attracts a group of unicorns after using a bottle of cologne.
At the Coffee Shop, Margaret serves coffee to Mordecai and Rigby. Mordecai is smitten by her (as usual), but Rigby tells him that she means nothing. Just then, the TV shows a commercial for a cologne that can attract women, called Dude Time.
Mordecai decides to get the cologne to get Margaret, but Rigby refuses to let him get it because they are supposed to play Strong Johns (a new video game) together. After having an argument, Mordecai decides to buy the cologne, and puts it on in the park. Rigby comes and tells Mordecai that it'll never work, which is proven when Pops appears, but runs away from the smell of the cologne. After Mordecai puts on more of the cologne, a bunch of frat-boy Unicorns come and explain "You don't use Dude Time to get the ladies, you use it to hang out with the bros!"
Mordecai gets mad, but the leader of the Unicorns tells Mordecai that he's "Pretty cool for letting [them] borrow some of his Dude Time," and agrees to help him attract Margaret. They first prank Mordecai by making him drink unicorn "slobber," but tell him they were just having a little fun; Rigby agrees with them, but then Mordecai punches him and the two begin to fight. The unicorns break them up, and say that they won't pull pranks on Mordecai. They then told Mordecai to gel his hair back, and "lay it down" for Margaret. He goes into the coffee shop and tells Margaret "I'm here to... lay it down." She just gets confused, and Mordecai leaves the coffee shop, worse off than before.
The Unicorns say the solution to the problem is "Partying at your place!" Inside the house, one of the unicorns pushes Mordecai down; even worse, Rigby pretends to help him, but psyches him out at the last minute, saying "Why don't you ask Margaret to help you?" Mordecai has enough, and tells Rigby to have fun with his new "friends," because Benson will fire Rigby when he finds out about the party. Mordecai then walk out and leaves Rigby to deal with his new "friends." During the party, Rigby finds Benson tied up and gagged and upset, and one of the Unicorns eats his gumballs. Another unicorn destroys Rigby's bed (which is a small trampoline).
Rigby goes to Mordecai and begs for help, but Mordecai tells him to ask his new "friends" for help; then, Rigby says that if they played the video game earlier, none of this would have happened. Mordecai said that he was sorry about the video game, but that it doesn't give Rigby the right to treat him like garbage, so Rigby apologizes numerous times, and is on the brink of tears by the end, asking if that was what he wanted to hear. Then Rigby yells "I miss you!" to him. Mordecai finally agrees to help him. They go to Skips, who already knows about the Unicorn problem (because they peed on his lawn) and he agrees to help them. He tells Mordecai and Rigby that there's one thing Unicorns never say no to: Drag Racing.
They host a drag race, with the unicorns in a Top-Fuel Dragster, and Mordecai and Rigby driving the golf-cart. As the race begins, the unicorns speed away. Skips press a button which releases a ramp in the Unicorns' path, which sends them flying into the sky; Benson then presses another button, which blows up the Unicorns' car, and explains that it's the only way to get rid of them. He then hoses Mordecai and Rigby down, and orders them to clean up all the mess, or he'll make them wish they were the ones driving the Unicorns' car. He then tells Mordecai to quit spraying that cologne, and it won't get him any ladies. He asked them to clean up in time. Rigby then asks,"Strong Johns?" and Mordecai says, "Yeah."